wedding frustrations

What makes people think that they can dictate what you can and can't do?
Yesterday I told my aunts that I would like to skip the custom of kissing the stefana right after the ceremony. One of them reacted badly to this announcement. She actually said that it is out of the question! I love her dearly, but what makes her think that she has any say in this?

One of the reasons she mentioned was the absence of my mom. She actually said "don't even think about it, especially since the most important person will not be there." Which is precisely the second most important reason for not wanting to do this. What exactly makes her believe that she or anyone else can replace or stand in the shoes of my mom and her blessing?

But, the most important reason is one that everyone fails to understand. The fact that I am marrying a person who is of different background and culture, a person who has not put any requests or objections forward, a person who is willing not to have all of his family and friends at this wedding just so that I do! And the argument that they put forward is that you come to Cyprus, you are making a Cypriot wedding. In other words, I should not divert from anything they are used to seeing.

My family has expectations about this wedding. They cannot consider that my situation is a little different. Just because I chose to get married in Cyprus it does not mean that my partner's culture will be left out. Their idea of difference is all about decoration and how much money will be spent. I am stuck in the middle. And part of the problem is that I don't know what I want. Do I want to make them happy without considering that I should incorporate some of the culture that I embraced? Or do I think about what I would like to do, what I like about weddings and skip everything that I don't. In terms of the kissing of the stefana....I don't know. I actually don't know where to stop. Bryan will only have his parents. It is very inconsiderate of I to put him through I don' even know how many sets of aunts and uncles....I don't like this custom. I don't. From now on, I think that I will not say the real reasons why I don't want to do some things. I will just say that I simply don't like it!

Who would have thought that my father would be the most easy to work with.....